SUN SIGN PRAYERS
ARIES: Dear God, please give me patience... right now!
TAURUS: Dear God, help me accept change. But please, not just yet.
GEMINI: Dear God... wait, who is God? Where is God? Why is God - Hey, why not Goddess...? Who are You? What are You? Why can’t anybody tell me...?
CANCER: Dear God!!!
LEO: Hi Dad!
VIRGO: Dear God, please make us perfect and don't mess it up like You did the last time.
LIBRA: Dear God, please help me to be decisive. But, on the other hand, maybe I’m meant to be this way. What do you think?
SCORPIO: Our Father, forgive us our wrongdoings as we forgive those who do wrong to us - even though the b*****ds deserve to rot in hell!
SAGITTARIUS: Dear Lord Almighty Everlasting, Omnipresent Creator of All - if I've asked you once, I've asked you at least a million times, help me stop exaggerating!!!
CAPRICORN: Dear God! I'd like to ask you to help me, but I learned a long time ago not to rely on anyone else. So ignore this.
AQUARIUS: Hi dude! Some say you're male, some say female. I say we're ALL God. So, why do we need to pray? Let's have a party!
PISCES: Dear Lord, as long as I'm going to drown my sorrows with this bottle of wine tonight, please use my inebriation for Thy glory.
